Secret to Success
Ranzal: All right, bud! Time to power up Nina's rupie magic, so let's get out there and shout ourselves hoarse until everybody in town comes runnin' to her shop!
Luca: Heck yeah! We'll get so many customers in this place that it brings down the house! Uh, metaphorically, of course.
Nina: I, uh... Look, I don't know if you need to attack it with QUITE so much fervor...
Ranzal: HEAR YE, HEAR YE! Get yer butts over to the Nina Shop, where we got the finest selection this side'a Alberia! If she ain't stockin' it, you don't need it!
Ranzal: Hoy there, friend! Need some healin'? One drop'a this killer salve will have any wound healed up faster than ya can say "I love the Nina Shop more'n my own kids"!
Passerby: ANY wound?! That's incredible!
Ranzal: Well, I mean, I wouldn't try to reattach an arm with it or nothin', but for cuts and scrapes, yer sittin' pretty as a jaybird!
Passerby: Soooo...it's just medicine? Thanks, but I've got plenty of that already.
Luca: What are you doing, beef-for-brains?! Lemme show you how it's done!
Luca: Welcome one and all, to the Nina Shop, where our goods are always affordable! In fact, for a limited time only, everything in the store is HALF PRICE!
Passersby: HALF PRICE?!
Luca: That's right, friend! Why, you'd need a broadsword to slash these prices further! Now if you'll just step this—
Ranzal: Luca, you dope! If ya drop the price on everything by half, poor Nina's gonna lose her shirt AND her pants!
Luca: Oh crap! I didn't even think about math! Uhhh, sorry, folks! Got a bit ahead of myself there! It's actually a 30-percent-off sale! Or, um...maybe 20?
Passerby 1: Do you even KNOW your prices?
Passerby 2: This seems suspicious. I'm leaving.
???: The Nina Shop, is it...?
???: Excuse me, but is the shopkeeper Nina available at the moment?
Nina: You're the head of the merchant's guild! What can I do for you today?
Guildmaster: Well, it's about your barkers. I'm afraid they've stepped over the line from mere exuberance to outright lies and being a general nuisance to the community.
Nina: THEY DID WHAT?!
Ranzal & Luca: ...We're so ashamed.
Nina: *sigh* I'm just glad the guild head noticed before you two did something stupid. ...Er, or stupid-ER, I suppose.
Nina: False advertising and vague pricing are both slick roads down a long hill to losing your customer's confidence.
Nina: Had you two kept it up, my shop's reputation would've been in the gutter.
Luca: We're really sorry...but we know what we did wrong now! Give us another chance!
Ranzal: Yeah! We wanna bust our humps to help make yer rupie magic stronger!
Nina: Oh, enough already about that! I mean, the rupie magic is just...
Ranzal & Luca: Is what?
Nina: Uh...nothing. Anyway, I really don't need your help with the shop any more.
???: *sigh* I should have expected you two chowderheads to cause nothing but heartburn for poor Nina.
???: Seems like our wisdom is needed!
Nina: Well, if it isn't the peddler and the rupie- pinching mercenary from the Halidom! What are you two doing here?
Irfan: Prince Euden asked us to drop by and help Ranzal and Luca out if... Well, if what happened happened.
Nina: He...did? Oh, boy. This whole thing is starting to balloon out of control...
Francesca: Er, you look distraught. Something wrong?
Nina: Oh, er, no! Nothing at all! Ha ha...haaaaa.
Francesca: Aw, are you nervous? Not to worry! Irfan and I put our heads together and came up with a money-making scheme that's SURE to succeed!
Irfan: If you do exactly as we say, even Ranzal and Luca will be able to contribute to the store's prosperity.
Ranzal: Thanks, pal! Always lookin' out!
Luca: So what kind of plan is it? C'mon, tell us! We'd do anything to help!
Irfan: Aaaanything...? Good, because that's going to make this go a LOT faster.
Irfan: So all we need from you two...is blood.
Child: Mommy, look! What's everybody crowded around over there for?
Mother: Why, it looks like a street performance. Let's take a look, shall we?
Luca: Greetings to you all, fellow citizens! Please, gather round! Don't be shy!
Ranzal: Behold as the greatest archer in the land, Luca, shoots this apple held in my hand!
Luca: I aim, and three...two...one...FIIIIIRE!
Luca: Voila! The apple is split clean in two!
Spectators: OOOOOO! AAAAAAAH!
Ranzal: Uh...oh no! Egads!
Luca: Oh dear! It seems I have pierced the hand of my good and true friend, Ranzal!
Ranzal: I'm afraid ya did, old chum... but not to worry!
Ranzal: A wound like this ain't nothin' so long as I got this medicine from the Nina Shop! With just one application...
Ranzal: Behold! My hand's better'n before!
Luca: The wound is gone?! That's some truly incredible medicine!
Ranzal: Sure is, pal—and you good folks can buy all ya can hold over at the Nina Shop!
Youth: Hey! This isn't a street performance— it's an advertisement!
Man: Who cares WHAT it is? That medicine just glued the man's hand back together!
Child: I want some, Mommy! Pleeeeease?!
Mother: Well, I suppose you are always roughhousing, so maybe we'll buy some to keep in the cabinet, just in case.
Luca: Boy, I tell you what, that plan Irfan and Francesca came up with was a WINNER.
Ranzal: Who woulda ever thought to put fake blood inside an apple to make me seem injured?
As the days went by, Ranzal and Luca went all about town giving product demonstrations to great success, and customers began flooding the Nina Shop in search of her famous medicine.
Ranzal: This place is hoppin' like a rabbit convention in a sugar factory!
Luca: Nina's rupie magic is sure to get a huge power boost now!
Nina: Uuuuurgh... Umm...
Luca: Er, you don't look very happy about all of this, Nina.
Nina: Wh-what? No, I mean... Um...
Nina: Oh boooy! I'm soooo happy! I can feel such awesome power emanating from all the rupies I'm earning!
Ranzal: Well, that's what's important— plus, now our debt's been repaid!
Luca: Welp, have a good one, Nina! We're looking forward to having your help again in the future!
Nina: Rupie magic...
Nina: Let's see, today's sales are...
Nina: Oh! I finally hit my goal! I think this means my dream will be able to come true!
Nina: This happened faster than I thought— and there's no denying it's due to the big influx of money that came in today.
Nina: Ranzal and Luca—and everyone else in the Halidom—all worked so hard to help and support me.
Luca: Nina's rupie magic is sure to get a huge power boost now!
Nina: Oh, geez. This is just making it harder to tell them the truth...
Nina: I just sort of blurted out the whole "rupie magic" thing, but the truth is...
Nina: My power comes from this magical tool!
|